Stuck in the loop where I feel like I'm a bother to everyone again. Whenever I open my mouth, it feels like my words are poison and that I say hurtful things to people.
Also, I read in the blog of a friend of mine that she was leaving for a place with a friend of her, 'cause she had "real friends" there. I don't know why, but that sentence hurt a lot. I really try to be a good friend to her, considering there's a lot of people who has the wrong idea of her. But somehow she's making it tougher for me to keep up my nice behavior... So I'm not a real friend? She's been venting to me a few times before of how I let her down and how I ignore her. Well, I live far away. I can't come running all the time, plus I have my own problems to deal with. No matter how much I wish I could run to everyone when they're all feeling down, I can't physically nor mentally do that.
I am seriously growing tired of all this shit. Thinking about all of this wears me out, and it depresses me deeply. I know I can't help my friends who need it, I really do. I just wish that if people had issues with me in any way, they would actually man up and say so straight to me. I can't fix my flaws if no one tells me what I'm doing wrong.
It's so frustrating, seriously.
But that's it for now.
- Ai.
If a person keeps telling you there is something wrong with you all the time, and you constantly try to help them...then the problem isn't you.
ReplyDeleteAs much as it might hurt the moment you do it, cut the ties and let go, or else it will keep draining your energy until the point where you have none left.
So true, so true. After the incident and unecessary facebook drama a friend of hers created today, I have really had my share of her. I'm fed up and she's no longer someone I consider a part of my life.
Delete